Even if you are in a relationship, is this something you would say to yourself?

If not, why not? 

Probably because we are conditioned to believe it is selfish or conceited to love ourselves and we should always put other people first.  We go out of our way to make sure everyone else is looked after and often feel put out when this is not reciprocated.  People can spend their whole lives looking to be loved as much as they love others.

The thing is, the one person who can love us unconditionally, for the whole of our lives, is already here!  It is YOU, the real YOU, your higher self, your inner self.

Many of us can find that practising self-love is a challenge because we don’t believe we deserve to be loved unconditionally, but it is only a belief and beliefs can be changed.  Self-love is not selfish, it’s essential to our wellbeing.

Self-love is about getting in touch with ourselves, looking after our own wellbeing and taking control of our own happiness to push through these limiting beliefs.

Here are my top 10 tips to self-love:

  1. Accept who you are and where you are in your life right now.  You are unique in your own right, so just take a minute to think of all the things you are good at and make a list.  You will surprise yourself.
  2. You are good enough.  You can do and be, anything you want to, you just need to belief it.  Try changing ‘I can’t’ into ‘I can’.
  3. Be grateful for everything you already have in your life.  People who do are generally less stressed, happier and more focused.
  4. Set boundaries.  If you find yourself constantly doing things you really do not want to do because it doesn’t feel right, then say ‘NO’ and stick to it.  Properly set boundaries help us to find more fulfilment, make better decisions and take back control of our lives.
  5. Be kind to yourself.  Be aware of the words you use when talking about yourself and only use positive kind ones.  If you wouldn’t say them to a loved one, don’t say them about yourself.
  6. Forgive yourself and others.  Hanging on to feelings of anger and bitterness will only create sadness and misery for us, so let them go.  Moving forward with an understanding and a feeling of empathy can only bring us peace.
  7. Focus your attention on the things you want in your life and not on the things you don’t want.  The Universal Law of Attraction states that you attract into your life, whatever you think about, both good and bad.  So, keep your thoughts good and positive!
  8. Be honest with yourself.  Honesty allows us to make the lasting changes we need.  Change cannot last if we are continually trying to be something we are not.
  9. Surround yourself with positive, supportive people.  Negative Nellies only drain your energy!
  10. Tell yourself every day how amazing you are!  The more you do, the easier it gets and the more you start to BELIEVE it.

So, give yourself a big hug and start to love who you are!